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And now he had me sitting in his car! Funny how that works, isn't it? I was tempted to have sex with Jeremy just so he could tell all the jerks how much fun it had been to get me on my back. Wouldn't that make them feel stupid? I wouldn't even deny it either and when they came around, begging for a date because they thought I'd be an easy fuck? I'd totally blow them off. Again.The truth was that I had completely different reasons for letting Jeremy get my panties down. I didn't want to be gay and if letting a boy put his thing inside me was the cure for rampant flaming lesbianism, well ... I'd grit my teeth and take my medicine. I just really hoped I liked it. I mean, if Jeremy got his dick inside me and it turned out I hated it, then he wouldn't really be curing anything. He'd just be fucking a lesbian.That would totally suck in like seven different ways!So you can imagine how nervous I felt. I tried to keep smiling and make small talk, you know, act all normal and everything. My. Had I known what that coin wasgoing to do, I never would have used it!" I fingered the bottle I hadbeen drinking from. "I killed you!" I sobbed and fell onto the floor,great heaving sobs racked this body I now inhabited."I should have died...I should have died," I bawled. It was at thatmoment that I realized that I could never accept myself in her form,especially knowing I was the one who was responsible for her death.Gradually, I pulled myself from the floor and made my way to myapartment door.Down the hall and to the right was a door, I slowly and deliberatelymade my way to it. Opening it ever so slowly - so it wouldn't make asound, I stepped onto the stairs and pulled it closed behind me.Gradually I made my way up in the inky darkness, reaching my handsforward and feeling - searching for the door.My hand bumped the handle, giving it a turn it opened out to the roof ofmy apartment building. I was in turmoil, feeling so guilty for stealingher young form - intent to end my life. I.
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